Shadow hunting: Jealousy and unworthiness of love as blocks to unconditional love - Pure Light 1111

Shadow hunting: Jealousy and unworthiness of love as blocks to unconditional love


There’s is a huge push for us to dig deeper into some parts of us we may not want to fully own presently across the collective.

Over the past week I have seen this emerge amongst every one of my male clients and it’s a huge healing piece in not only self love but in removing the separation and competition between the sexes from eons.  It’s helping us to get to a place of embodying and actively practicing unconditional love for ourselves, our Twin Flames and ultimately humanity!  We must remember that this doesn’t happen overnight, it’s not only a consciousness shift but also calls for us to do a lot of ancestral belief and trauma clearing.

Our ancestors in most cases didn’t know what unconditional love was.  Love became blurred by condition, views of marriage, responsibility, security and often survival. So we will all hold some funky old genetic beliefs till healed.

The blocks I am seeing arise relate to healing competition between Twin Flames.  We must remember that in many lifetimes we may have been at battle together.  Leaving residue of competition and war consciousness.  It’s not always been a romantic connection.  This lingering competition energy is manifesting in bringing to the surface competition, jealousy, control, ownership beliefs that are clouding the view of some.  I have also seen this manifest in psychic attack.  In the scenarios I have seen it’s been the men psychically attacking their female counterparts through their own inferiority wounds and deep seated beliefs of unworthiness of love.  Projecting anger and jealousy in the form of negative thought forms and anger spears towards their counterpart.  Which can be felt physically and you may notice this manifest in confusion, headaches, physical pain in the body without any explanation regarding the where it came from, anxiety, fear, negative astral travel and negative intrusive thoughts.

Blame, projection and negative thinking about your Twin Flame manifests in creating negative thought forms which if charged with enough emotional intensity creates psychic attack.

Read more here:

Ultimately if you can’t be happy for your Twin Flame how can you love them unconditionally?  This is a big question that this scenario is bringing up.

If you are jealous of your Twin Flame how can you love them unconditionally?

Jealousy is never about the other person, it’s about you.  It comes from a place of inner lack projected out towards another.  The root is in a core belief of lack of love and it will manifest in many guises.

Jealousy and control are familiar dance partners.  If you believe at root you aren’t worthy of love and feel an inner lack of love.  This will rise to the surface in fear based behaviours to control your counterpart.  On a subconscious level there is a belief they are your only source of love and there’s fear if they leave then how will you survive. Forgetting love and validation are an inside job.

If you believe your Twin Flame is your only source of love.  Then it will be hard to love them unconditionally.  If they choose to experience life, love or success without you physically in this lifetime.  Your attachment is on your source of love not being available to you somehow which will cause you  alot of pain in the meantime.  It’s actually forcing you to heal the inner wounds blocking you from loving yourself and recognising that no other person can fill the void within.

Some may be reading this and thinking none of this applies.  So I thought I would share some beliefs which have come up in client sessions over the past week which are huge blocks to self love and any kind of healthy interdependent relationship with a Twin Flame counterpart. If you aren’t familiar with muscle testing.  It’s a form of kinesiology and will test subconscious beliefs.  Make sure your feet are flat on the floor and that you are grounded and well hydrated when you muscle test or you won’t get accurate results.  Also you must say the belief verbally out loud.  You can’t muscle test by saying something silently in your mind. Here’s a youtube video which shows you how to do it. Normally a positive response, meaning a ‘yes’ you hold the belief will mean you tilt forward.  A negative, so a ‘no’ response means you don’t hold the belief and you will tilt backwards.

Say these beliefs out loud!  Remember there’s no judgement here.  Keep detached and just allow the result to show.

Notice some of these are dual beliefs meaning we hold both the negative and positive belief!  Again, no judgement just see what is unveiled.

  • It hurts me to see my Twin Flame happy.
  • I’ll never be good enough for my Twin Flame.
  • I will destroy my Twin Flame if they find happiness without me.
  • I’m afraid to be with my Twin Flame and I’m afraid to be without them.
  • I don’t have the words to communicate with my Twin Flame.
  • I don’t love myself.
  • If my Twin Flame steps into their power they won’t need me.
  • I’m afraid my Twin Flame and I will have nothing to talk about.
  • My Twin Flame is more spiritually advanced than me.
  • I’m not worthy of the love of my Twin Flame.
  • My Twin Flame makes me feel bad about myself.
  • I’m not worthy of love.
  • I’m too good for my Twin Flame.
  • My Twin Flame doesn’t deserve me.
  • My Twin makes me feel bad about myself as they are more healed than me.
  • My Twin Flame is out of my league.
  • I’m more healed than my Twin Flame.
  • I can only be happy if I am in physical union with my Twin Flame.
  • I can’t be happy for my Twin Flame if they are in a relationship with someone else.
  • I’m jealous of my Twin Flame.
  • I own my Twin Flame.
  • I’m frightened if my Twin Flame heals themselves as they won’t need me anymore.
  • I’m jealous of my Twin Flames happiness.
  • I don’t want to be in a relationship with my Twin Flame but I don’t want anyone else to have them.
  • I put all my happiness in the hands of my Twin Flame.
  • My Twin Flame is my only source of love.
  • I’m jealous of my Twin Flames success.
  • My Twin Flame isn’t enough.
  • Its my Twin Flames fault I feel so bad.
  • Its my Twin Flames fault my life is such a mess.
  • I want my Twin Flame to be happy whether they are physically with me or not in this lifetime.

Holding these beliefs against yourself and your Twin Flames results in energy blocks.  Some of the internalised feelings relate to traumas not even from this lifetime.  Yet when we’re triggered we can instantly believe the cause of the injury/threat is something our Twin Flame did.

I have found the easiest way to handle anything that comes up for me regardless of the root is to clear my energy and forgive myself and the other person.  I know I don’t want the physical energy of anger or resentment in my energy field.  So my first response if triggered is to clear my energy then I forgive myself and the other person to release them and I from the energetic charge.  I use the Forgiveness – keys to your own cage meditation from the Twin Flame Healing Program.

Once I have done these two simple steps I’m back to equilibrium.  It’s from this space that I then dig into what’s gone on, what’s the root and what needs to be healed.  I then resolve it and have gratitude for the new layer of the energetic onion that’s been uncovered and healed.

If you want to read more about forgiveness read here:

Our shadow is the unloved, unhealed and unevolved parts of ourselves that we need to show compassion, kindness and a bit of tough love to.  We do need to face these pieces no matter how cringe worthy they are.  Until we do they will pull us off course and we will find ourselves in a trap of self sabotage cycles.

This soul journey takes us into the deeper layers of self so we can learn to love ourselves regardless of what we have or haven’t done in this and all lifetimes.  We can heal those pieces and choose to make changes that are more in alignment with love.  Love for ourself firstly, filling the inner well.  Reconnecting with our love of the creator and then expanding this out to humanity!  One step at a time.

For those following the Twin Flame Healing Program here’s some areas to help if you tested yes for any of the above beliefs.

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  • Do the Dark night of the soul meditation.  Often when your in dark night if the soul you will go into fear and then blame your TF!
  • Write a letter to your Twin Flame telling them how you feel since realising the undercurrent beliefs that you held.  Pour your heart out and get the fears and emotions that are stirring inside- Out onto paper.
  • Write out 30 bullet points of any resentments, grudges and regrets you are holding about your Twin Flame and the situation between you (remember most of this is your own wounds projected against them and nothing that’s their fault).
  • Do the Forgiveness – key to your own cage meditation and set the intention that everything in the letter and all resentments, grudges and regrets are cleared and replaced with love.  Ensure you forgive yourself too!  Then burn the letter afterwards.
  • Time to focus on self love!  Do the blocks to soul love meditation daily for 30 days.  This will create new positive beliefs in your subconscious and raise your self esteem.
  • Clear your energy daily.  If you go into jealousy, fear or lack mentality about your life or TF go clear it.  Otherwise you are projecting this against them causing more blocks.
  • Do the journey of the soul core wound clearing meditation weekly for a month. This will help work on clearing the core wound of unworthiness of love.
  • Use the Past life road blocks meditation.  Before starting set the intention to be taken to the root situation that is causing you not to be able to be happy for your Twin Flame.  Ask for this wounding to be cleared and healed.
  • Use the Past life road blocks meditation.  Before starting set the intention to be taken to the root situation that is causing you to be jealous of your Twin Flame.  Ask for this wounding to be cleared and healed.

Time for action.

Now many will realise this particular piece of shadow work is pretty low vibrational and it really does need to be followed up with a good shake up in your daily routine to actually change your life and not slip into this situation again.

Suggested ideas:

  • Good self care routines.  Daily exercise to help raise your serotonin levels, improve your health and confidence.  Do something you enjoy.
  • Journal daily.  Start getting the inner confusion out onto paper daily then burn it.  Clear the mind chatter energy of the day with this ritual.
  • Get into a regular sleeping pattern. Our hormones are hugely affected by how much rest we get.  So give them a hand and get into a routine.
  • Get into a routine of having at least one meal a day which is plant based.  Why?  It’s will hold a large amount of natural life force energy which in turn will make you feel more energised!  Again find something you enjoy.  That way you will integrate it easily into your life.
  • Daily affirmations.  These make a big difference in how we feel.  Try saying these outloud 50x daily.
    • I love myself
    • I’m loved
    • I’m loveable
    • I deserve love
    • I’m worthy of love
  • Do something daily that brings you joy.  So many on the Twin Flame journey aren’t actually living their lives.  They are waiting for life to happen to them.  Get out and create a life worth living.  If that means making some small or big changes, then do it!  When we are loving ourselves and our lives we have no reason to be jealous of others.  Through our own happiness we become a magnet for the universe to bring us more positive experiences, people and love into our lives.  Push yourself out of your comfort zone.
  • Surrender the outcome! Get out of your own way!  Trust that if you fill yourself with love, heal the wounds and do what it takes to create a fulfilling life of purpose for yourself.  You will energetically attract what you need to you!

This journey isn’t meant to be done alone.  Often we have wounds that are too frightening to face alone.  So reach out and get support.

If you would like a 121 session with me you can book online here:

Love and blessings

Allera xx

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